How to Relax?

If you want to know how to relax, I'm going to give you some suggestions.

However, many people I know who ask about how to relax often say to me after I've taught them a relaxation technique that they still couldn't relax.

So try one of the relaxation exercises - like the body scan or the mindful movement exercise and see what happens.

Or try the guided relaxation and meditation exercises on my CD (or downloadable mp3) Time to Breathe and Relax.

If these techniques don't work, you may need a different type of approach.

Do not despair.

Instead -

Do something that will shift your focus... like

• Walk outside and get a different perspective.
• Distract your mind - take your mind off of what's been bugging you by...
  • Exercising
  • Playing a game
  • Watching TV or going to a movie
  • Asking someone else to tell you their problems
• Shake your body for 1-2 minutes.
• Ask yourself - How could I enjoy today?

If none of these work... there is a possibility you're resistant to change.

You could be attached to feeling stressed and tense. Even though it's uncomfortable and unhealthy, if it's what you're familiar with, you may want to hold onto it.

So... Sometimes we have to explore our resistance. One of the best exercises I've found for this is affirmation playtime.

Here's one more perspective you can consider...

Usually if you're not feeling relaxed-and-at-ease... then there is an imbalance between your head, body, and emotions.

• If you're stuck in your head - move and feel your body. You could try mindful movement.
• If you're stuck in your body - ask yourself what's bothering you and listen to your answer.
• If you're stuck in your emotions - brainstorm five ways or more you could solve whatever it is that's upsetting you.

But relaxing can be challenging when the tension or stress has pulled you in like mud or quicksand - and it feels like you're stuck in it.

In fact, that is probably what happened. To find out how we get stuck read about neural grooves and changing your thinking.

So how to relax and turn the tension off and get unstuck?

Many of us use watching TV, drinking alcohol, eating, internet surfing, reading novels, or shopping to "relax" and shift our focus from what has been stressing us...

Is this good or bad for us?

Which is better...

Practicing Diaphragmatic Breathing or watching TV?

In my opinion... it depends.

It seems that all of these potentially addictive behaviors can help us shift our focus... and in the short term... that can be a very good thing.

It turns out that results from a study of 909 women indicate that TV makes us happy.

But maybe watching TV, drinking alcohol, eating, internet surfing, reading novels, or shopping distracts us from what we don't like about our lives...

What if it were possible to love life and feel joyful, motivated, and excited every day...

If it were, would you want to distract yourself?

Check out this YouTube video about the impact of TV.

Learning Stress Management Techniques is one step along the way of shifting from tolerating life to consciously and intentionally co-creating your life in alignment with what Really matters.

If you want to learn more about how to relax, go to Relaxation Techniques.